I Went to the Beach Alone, And It's Actually So Much Fun Stop Looking at Me

I arrive at the beach at 7am. Just me. All by myself. Taking in the beauty of nature without anyone. I drove here alone and walked up to the sand alone. “Oh the sand is cold this early in the day,” I say out loud, forgetting for a moment that I am alone. 

I set up my towel. I look at the freckles on my leg and the lower part of my ankle which always seems to get hairy before the rest of my leg. I tweet about it. God, it feels amazing to just be myself by myself at the beach.

I fall asleep for 4 hours. It’s 11 am and other people are starting to arrive. That’s fine, I don’t know them so I’m still technically alone. Suddenly the beach is filled with groups of people. Families, friends, lovers.  I wonder why no one else is alone. I feel a bit self-conscious, but I can get past it.

ONE OF THEM LOOKS AT ME. OH GOD I LOOK SO WEIRD AND ALONE SITTING HERE ALONE.

I pick up my phone. “I’m just down by the water,” I say into my phone while waving towards the parking lot. “Where are you guys? This group beach friend hangout day isn’t going to work if you are this late! Haha, I’m only kidding I love you guys,” people seem to be listening to me.

“Wait what? I thought you said you were here?” I look around the beach frantically, flailing my arms a bit too much. If that family, or group of teenagers thought I was waiting for a friend they will have no doubts now.

“No I haven’t seen them.” I’m yelling a bit.  “How long ago?” Fulling yelling now, “I took a nap. Maybe they’re already swimming.” Really yelling from my gut, “WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY CAN’T SWIM?!”

I run down to the the edge of the water in a panic. “I don’t see them!” I scream into my phone. “FRIIIIIIENDS” I cry out to the water. I should have picked names. “MY Friends!!!” Better. “HELP. HELP.” Everyone looks so concerned. “MY FRIENDS ARE OUT THERE. UNDER THE WATER. THEY CAN’T SWIM. OH GOD SOMEONE HELP” My grade 10 drama class is really paying off. I do this for five or six minutes.

“They were so young,” I say “I am so young,” I add.

A group of people surround me now. All very worried. All very sure that I have friends. The water is filled with lifeguards and Good Samaritans. Paramedics and police officers wait anxiously on the sand. Someone brings up sharks, it wasn't me though, because this is a lake. A lot of people are crying and hugging, wondering how things got to this point and I can't help but notice my phone light up. I got 3 likes on my ankle tweet. That's great for a Wednesday. I'm grateful.   

A week later they find a body and I pretend I knew them - I regret this part for sure.